The Theory of Permanent Age

by Geoff Cottrill

October 2009

What is it about getting older that makes you want to be younger?

No, I am not having a mid-life crisis. I am not even sure what that means. I’ve seen friends go through it. I’ve seen them come out the other side of it happy with a new sports car. I’ve seen some come out of it miserable and without their family. I am not interested in that……although the car does sound kind of cool.

One day many, many years ago a woman said something to me that I will never forget. We woke up one Saturday morning and were chatting in bed. She said, “I have a theory. I think that all people are a certain age. And, I think that they are that age forever”.

I laid there and thought about what she had just said. I was 30 years old at the time. I had things figured out. I knew it all. Or, at least I thought I did.  I wasn’t married and was enjoying my days of being single. At this moment I didn’t want to buy into what this girl was telling me. I told her that I thought she was crazy. That was the end of the conversation.

Two years later I was laying in bed with that same woman. She was now my wife. In the past two years we had gotten engaged, moved to a new city in the midwest, gotten married, changed jobs, moved back to the city in the south where we met, and had our oldest daughter, and we had  our second on the way. We also got a dog in the midst of these crazy two years. I must admit it. I was feeling pretty old. I was feeling the responsibilities of life bearing down on me. I was happy. And, I was sad. And, I wasn’t ready for what I was facing. I guess maybe I had not yet grown up. I wasn’t acting my age. I was running away from it.

So, back to the real story at hand. After thinking about this “theory of  permanent age” for two years I decided it was time to finally tell this girl about the conclusion I had come to. So, I woke her up. She rubbed her eyes and looked at me with a twinkle in her eye and that little smile I fell in love with. I looked at her and said, “I’ve been thinking. I think you’re right. Your “theory of permanent age” is right, I think”. My wife looked at me as if I was a bit strange (which I am). She said, “have you been thinking about this for a long time?”. I said something to the effect that yes, I am sometimes slow to come to the right conclusions ( I went to Florida State for crying out loud – we’re not known for our thesis statements and theories on life…we’re not even known for a good football team anymore!) and in this case it had only taken me 2 years and a lot of craziness in my life to realize she was right.

So, think about it for a minute. How old are you? Are you as old as your true age? Are you younger? Are you an old person or a young kid? Close your eyes for a minute and think about it.

Me, I am a kid at heart, maybe 13 years old. My body and the lines on my face remind me every day that I am 46 years old. I can’t run as fast or jump as high. I have long ago given up one of my life’s passions – soccer. But in my mind and in my heart I am young. I am still the kid that stood there on my 13^th birthday and watched the fireworks on the day of America’s bicentennial (1976). I became a teen on one our country’s biggest days and it’s a day when everyone around me – friend and foe – was happy, smiling, and seemingly united around the ideas our country was founded on. It was one of the four greatest days on my life. So, maybe that’s why, in my head, I am still a kid. Life was less complicated. There were fewer meetings. There were fewer business trips. There were more friends to hang out with.  There was a lot to do after school and before dinner. Bikes to ride, soccer games to play, friends to hang out with. But, as much as I remember that day as near perfect I wouldn’t go back there even if I could. I like where I am now….46 in years, 13 in my mind.

If I apply this theory to people I know I see them in a new light. I have friends that I have known along the way that were 65 when they were actually 21 and in college. I have friends who were 35 when they were 14. I have 40 year old friends who are still 11, or at least they still act 11. I have a friend who is 45 and will forever be single and 25. I have another friend who is 43 and acts 17. His behavior cost him his marriage. I have seen the grandparents of my friends who are still 30 years old in their hearts – as happy as they have ever been.

You see, to me there is a difference between “acting” a certain age and actually “being” an age in your heart and your soul. Those who go through the dreaded mid-life crisis are merely acting a certain age. They are reaching back for something that can’t be regained. Those who are 70 and feel 30 are the ones that fit with this theory. These are the people who have embraced who they are inside. They aren’t trying to run back to a time in their lives when they were younger and free from the things that bring them down today.

So, this is the “theory of permanent age” that my beautiful wife taught me all those years ago. It took me a long time to come to terms with it, to understand it and to embrace it. But, after all these years I know that it’s true. I guess I didn’t have it all figured out all those years ago. Thank God for that.

Now, close your eyes once again. How old are you acting and how old are you truly feeling? Stay young at heart but stop acting like a kid…..because the kids you have are counting on you to show them the way through this world we live in. Skip the mid life crisis for their sake, if not for yours.

Thanks for listening.

G

 

Jacko the Whacko

By Geoff Cottrill

November 3, 2009

OK, my last few entries have been more on the softer side. This one is going to make a few of you mad……or at least question my understanding of music and its superstars that drive its business.

I’ll never fully understand the world of music. It’s a simple business. It’s a broken business. But, music itself remains a bit of a mystery. What makes one song a monster global hit and another song just track #7 on an album that will soon be completely forgotten about…….forcing that song to sit in its place on that record, never to be played again. Millions of songs have been written. Only thousands of them any good, or at least thought of as good by the people that seem to know about these things. There are plenty of lists. These lists will tell you about the great ones. These lists will never tell you about the bad ones.

I’ve kept my mouth shut (more or less) for the last several months as the world has mourned the death of a global superstar – Michael Jackson. I never had anything against Michael Jackson. I grew up with the Jackson 5 and the Osmond Brothers. I sided with the Jacksons all the way. Michael was a born entertainer and he captured the hearts and minds of many kids in a time when racial tensions were far worse (or at least much more visible) than they are today. Michael and his brothers helped to shape my musical taste. I am grateful for the Jackson 5.

Michael Jackson. Jacko as the UK press used to love to call him. As Michael became older he became more and more isolated from the real world most of us live in. The more that time marched on, the stranger he seems to be getting. He was on TV, shopping in a store, buying every tacky thing in there all while on camera. The audience watched and thought to themselves – “this guy is nuts”.

Michael Jackson. Jacko. The same guy that held his baby over the balcony. As the press hounded him, chased him, and snapped his every move, Michael fell further and further into solitary confinement. He thought it was ok to hold his baby over the railing in order to show the world. He held the baby over the railing because he probably was sick of being chased. He held his baby over the railing so the hounds could get their picture.

He retreated into his palace in California. Neverland. He had carnival rides, a merry-go-round, and animals. I guess some would say he was living the childhood he never had. He was accused of terrible things. He was accused of things that as a father make me sick to my stomach. He was never convicted for these accusations. He was never formally found to be guilty. If the common man had been accused of these crimes he would never be able to shake it from his reputation. Never – ever.

Michael Jackson. The King of Pop. I was a sophomore or a junior in high school when Thriller was released. It was a pinnacle moment in time. Music video was still in its early stages. The “event” album was still important to the business. The video is still relevant today. The album broke every record. Everyone knows this record. This record was released long before the crazy shopping spree, the Neverland ranch sleepovers, and the holding of the baby over the railing. This record was released long before that. Before Michael Jackson changed. Before he retreated. Before he started acting in unusual ways.

Michael Jackson. Crowned by the world as a king. Michael Jackson. The same guy that caught on fire during a Pepsi commercial shoot. Michael Jackson. The same artist who had one of his manager’s call me one day while I worked for another major soft drink company. The manager said to me, “Michael has always loved Coke. He’s always been a Coke guy”. When I asked him why he did a Pepsi commercial if he was a “Coke guy” he said he did it for the money. He then went on to say that Michael wanted to personally get involved with Coke. I told the guy, “no way. We don’t take Pepsi’s old celebrities”.

He then said something to me that I will never forget. He said, “So, what you’re telling me is that YOU are going to be the guy at Coke who says NO to Michael Jackson? Are you kidding me?”. True story. I said no to Michael Jackson. The manager went on to say, “when people find out YOU were the one at Coke who said NO to Michael Jackson when his next album drops, YOU are going to get fired”. No joke, this is all true. I said, “I appreciate your perspective but my guess is that when “they” find out that I was the guy who said NO to Michael Jackson, I will probably get promoted”. I then thanked him kindly and went on my way. The Company survived my mishap if you were wondering. Michael’s record came out and we somehow still managed to sell a billion drinks a day.

But, this isn’t what this story is about.

Michael Jackson. Jacko the Whacko.  The same superstar who, while on tour in Japan, had his manager call his lawyer in LA. He asked him to fly half way around the world to meet with Michael to discuss his new contract with his record label. Once the lawyer arrived he was asked to wait in the living room of Michael’s hotel suite for 4 hours while Michael did whatever he was doing. Michael then suddenly walked in, asked to see his new contract, flipped to a random section, underlined a meaningless sentence, asking the lawyer to explain it. Once the lawyer answered the question Michael abruptly stood up and walked out of the room without saying a word. The lawyer sat there for another hour before the manager came out and told him that Michael had asked him to come to Japan just to “remind you who you work for”. The lawyer flew home.

Michael Jackson. The freak show. Michael became a side show. He became fodder for the press. He helped to sell a lot of People magazines, a lot of Rolling Stone magazines, a bunch of newpapers. He helped to drive viewers to TV tabloid shows like ET, Extra! Extra!, and Inside Edition. People watched the local news to see Michael’s latest behavior. No matter what happened in the world, Jacko was always good for ratings. He did strange things and we loved to watch the freak show from the cheap seats.

Michael Jackson. The victim. Yeah, we turned him into the King of the Super-freak nation. We made him run away. We were the ones who took his childhood away. We were the ones who snapped the pictures. We were the ones who wanted to see that baby held over the railing.

Michael Jackson. The King of Pop. The same guy that wasn’t selling a lot of records the day before he died. Michael Jackson. The same superstar that most of us (if we’re really honest with ourselves) thought was a freak show. We weren’t thinking about Michael and what a wonderful humanitarian he was. We were involved with our own lives, our own problems, a broken economy, massive unemployment, government bail outs of banks, and Wall Street bankers still receiving massive bonus checks while the other 99.5% of the country is struggling. We were not thinking about Michael, his Neverland Ranch, his upcoming tour, his damaged reputation, or his obsession for privacy while at the same time a desire to be King of the world.

Nope. We weren’t thinking about any of this. The day before Michael passed away in his sleep, the day before his doctor allegedly injected him with something to help him sleep, we were not thinking about Michael. We weren’t driving in our cars listening to his music. We weren’t buying his posters or his catalog of music. We also weren’t buying his image as a humanitarian. We just weren’t buying anything he was selling.

But, then a simple twist of fate. The reclusive, obsessive, ego driven, morally questionable King of Pop sipped way from an overdose of something. Suddenly, we all cared. We dropped everything to cry for Michael. We lined the streets, filled the parks. We lit candles, left stuffed animals at make shift memorials, made signs, created thousands of Facebook tribute pages. The world stopped. The People Magazines started selling again, the people started watching programs like ET, Extra! Extra, and Inside Edition. We couldn’t get enough. Advertisers started buying time on these programs. And, for a minute, the death of  a King actually helped move the economy ahead. Businesses were selling trinkets. Record companies were actually SELLING music as anything by Michael Jackson rocketed to the top of the charts. iTunes broke download records. Newspapers sold extra copies. Special magazine tributes were printed. And, we bought it all.

A movie was released. A movie that showed the behind the scenes development of his tour that never happened. It showed the “softer side” of Michael. It showed intimate moments with his band and his friends. And, we lined up all around the block and down the street – all over the world – to catch one last glimpse of the King of Pop. We just couldn’t get enough of Michael. “We love you Michael!”, people cried all over the planet.

I’m no better or worse than anyone else. I am not above others. But, I do have opinions. And in this case my question is this:

Where the hell were all of you the day before Michael Jackson died? Michael Jackson. The King of Pop. Michael Jackson. Jacko the Whacko. I’ll bet that if you’re really honest with yourself you were not as in love with Michael Jackson and all of the “good he stood for” just before he died. If we would have been thinking about him. If we genuinely cared about this King, we wouldn’t have isolated him. We wouldn’t have sent him into exile. We wouldn’t have ostracized him for the terrible things he was accused of. We must not forget the things we thought about Michael the day before he died as we morn him the day after he died. Its just not right.

So, lets be honest with ourselves. We only really care about people like the King after they are dead and gone. Just like Marilyn Monroe and Elvis, Michael Jackson will live forever. We live in a world where we worship the idea of what somebody stood for, not what the person they actually were. Its much easier to worship a dead star than a living recluse. It helps us forget abut our own problems for a while. It somehow gives us hope.

It’s a shame that Michael Jackson is gone from this world. He gave us some good music. But, I am not going to cry for him now because I must admit, I stopped caring about him long before he died. I watched from afar as he turned himself into a super freak. And, when I heard he died and stood back and watched the reaction I found myself terribly disappointed in this world we live in. Instead of focusing our energy on making this world a better place, we stood still and cried over the death of a person we didn’t care about the day before.

Its just sad….and it kind of makes me sick.

Thanks for listening…..

G

 

“Connecting with Claire”

by Geoff Cottrill

October 2009

Yesterday, while I sat in a meeting, on the other side of the country from my family, a funny thing happened to me. What happened was another reminder that music connects us all. It is passed from generation to generation, person to person. The chain goes on forever.

Yes, the industry of music is sick with an incurable disease. It sits in its hospital bed blaming the world for their state of being. They are the old guy in the room just down at the end of the hall. You can hear the grumpy screams coming from the last door on the left…..”where’s my breakfast?”  They’ve been groaning so long that the doctors and nurses have stopped listening. With the exception of the occasional music talent show, its family business is nearing bankruptcy while they lie there and complain.

But, this is not what this piece is about. I have already written that piece – several times.

This is about how a text message from your 11 year old daughter can make your day, reconfirming why music is so important in our lives. It is about how something as simple as a song can forever connect you to someone. In this case, it’s my daughter Claire.

A little about Claire (aka “The Bear”). Claire is an 11 year old with the heart and soul of someone who has lived before. She as a keen sense of right and wrong. She feels things deeply in her soul. She is thoughtful, funny, sensitive, and complex all at once. She is 11 in age only – but not in spirit.

Claire likes to explore my music collection. My iTunes has something like 13,000 songs in it. Over the years I have taken advantage of car rides to school and to lacrosse practice, or a trip to the store. I have tried to expose her to some of the artists who have been important in my life. Artists like Radiohead, The Rolling Stones, Marvin Gaye, Bob Marley, Beck, Bill Withers, The Beatles, Clapton, Motown, Pink Floyd, Jack Johnson, Gomez, and a dozen others. One day a few years ago from the backseat she informed me that she was “getting into jazz”. She went on to say something to the effect of “jazz makes me relax…..i really like the way it makes me feel Daddy”. So, this is a little context on Claire and her love for music. She is also the same girl who, on the day of the Jonas Brothers concert and a pre-arranged chance to meet them, looks at me and says, “Daddy, can we hang out at home….i’m not into the Jonas Brothers……they just aren’t that good”. No one was more happy than me to not have to endure a Jonas Brothers show…and have an 11 year old daughter who wanted to hang out with me instead of going to the show.

This is Claire.

About two and a half years ago, as I was kissing her goodnight, she removed her earplugs to say something to me. She said, “Daddy, I really like Beck…..his song e-pro is amazing”. I’d never played it for he. She found it on her on as she sifted through my iTunes folder. She did the same thing with the band Gomez’s song See The World. The same thing happened when she discovered Bob Marley and told me she liked that “song about the little birds”. It made my day.

Ok, back to the story at hand. I was in one of the biggest meetings of my career yesterday. The team I am on flew across the country to present our strategic business plan to our parent company. It was an important meeting. After our presentation ended, I was sitting in the back of the room listening to the next group’s presentation. I snuck a look at my blackberry. Yeah, I know. I should have been paying attention. But, I wasn’t.

I had received a text message from Claire.

Here’s exactly what it said:

“Hey guess what song i LOVE???  Hey jude by the beatles!”

So, as I sat in the room, in the middle of my important meeting, on the other side of the country from my wife, my two beautiful daughters, and my dog Tucker, I get this simple little text from my 11 year old music lover.

I wanted to stand up and scream! I wanted to say, “hey, guess what! My daughter just discovered Hey Jude for the first time!” instead, I typed her a quick response, “YES!!!!!!!!!!”, was my reply.

She hit me back immediately with, “Hah, its like my favorite song!”

I sat there for a few minutes as a proud father. I sat there with a new connection to my daughter….made as I was on the other side of the country…..sitting in a meeting.

And, thanks to the guys from Liverpool……..a lifelong memory that I will forever cherish. Thanks guys. Its safe to say that the torch has been passed and you will be remembered always.

Yes, music can and does do amazing things. I just wish it could be powerful enough to save its industry from itself……while it lies in its hospital bed and blames the world for its woes.

Stay tuned….and, thanks for listening.

G

PS – here’s a bit of advice I think we could all use right about now…….sing it out loud.

Hey Jude,  don’t make it bad

Take a sad song and make it better

Remember,

To let her into your heart

Then you can start

To make it better.

And anytime you feel the pain

Hey Jude, refrain

Don’t carry the world upon your shoulders

For well you know that it’s a fool

Who plays it cool

By making his world a little colder.

Reality TV

by Geoff Cottrill

October 2009

OK, its been going on long enough. I can’t stand it any longer. I’ve almost stopped watching TV as a result of it. Reality TV is reducing us to something that I don’t ever want to be. Reality TV is sucking our souls from us.

What is it about reality TV that has people so captivated? Why is it that almost every single night of the week the TV line-up is filled with these shows? There are housewives in Atlanta, Newport Beach, and in New Jersey. There are people who swap wives. They swap their families. There are nanny’s who come and discipline your kids. There are survivors on an island back stabbing each other for money. There are cop shows featuring bad-boy, bad-boy (what ‘ya gona do?) drunks. There are guys out at sea fishing for crabs. There are people locked in a house while George Orwell’s big brother watches their every move. There are talent-less talent shows. There are auditions to be the next great American star. There are people who can’t sing a note on these programs. We laugh at their failures so we can ignore our own. We watch a couple with 8 kids ruin each other’s lives while they give interviews to Entertainment Tonight. We watch bachelors sift through 20 women looking for true love. We then watch the rejected runner up from that show get her own so she can work through 20 guys of her own. After the season, the couple will be on Oprah. Everyone will cry. People who go on Oprah always cry. Oprah and her audience cry along.  They will be featured on the cover of People Magazine. After the last edit from the final show they will find that they now need to face a new reality. A world away from the competition and the cameras. A real life. And, chances are their  “true love” will fall apart. This will bring more People Magazine covers, more interviews on Entertainment Tonight. The cycle continues……and we’re caught up in it. We simply can’t get enough of the news coverage. The news coverage that is actually covering nothing at all. The empty news coverage that shows like Extra! Extra! pump out every night.

We sit and we watch. We leave our own reality behind, we clear our minds and we tune in almost every night. We watch someone else’s reality while running away from our own. It’s train wreck TV (the new and improved “Must See TV”). We drive by the train wreck and we know something terrible has happened. We are afraid to look but as we drive by we look through our fingers as we fake an attempt to cover our eyes. We can’t look away. This is today’s TV reality. We have little kids and their parents faking an emergency as the world watches the balloon float away glued to the TV as we hope the little boy will be OK. We then find the next day that this family has been on a few reality programs. It was all a hoax. They needed more time in the spotlight. So, they create a lie. They make the world believe that their young son is in danger. They do this because the need to be seen by the world. They can’t get enough of being in the public eye. Where does reality TV end and real life begin? Its becoming harder and harder to tell the difference.

What happened to us? Why are we so obsessed with the lives of some housewives in Atlanta, Orange County, or New Jersey? Why are we running away from our own reality just to watch someone else’s? I know what you are going to say. You’re going to tell me that these reality shows help you to escape. They help you forget for just a little while what your own world is really like. I don’t buy it any more.

Yeah, and the networks love them too. They are low budget. Any ya-hoo with an idea can get a reality show on TV these days. No experience needed. All you need is a camera, some people with 8^th grade educations, some family drama, a good guy and a bad guy. Once you have these things you call up almost any network executive or Hollywood agent and get it on TV. Chances are if you have an original idea like filming a raving jerk of a real estate agent as he sells houses in LA and you have a hit show.

Art imitates life and then life imitates art. The cycle continues to repeat itself as time marches on until we will no longer be able to tell the difference any more. When this happens we’ll live in a world where it’s acceptable to cheat, steal, and lie just to win the game. We need to escape from this reality that plays on our expensive flat panel screens every night as we sit there glued to the TV, waiting for the next couple to be kicked off the race around the world. We’re coming to the point when being able to see the difference between true reality or made-for-tv reality that isn’t really real at all.

Andy Warhol once said that everyone gets their 15 minutes of fame. From what I’ve seen on TV the past few years I’d say that quite a few people have completely wasted theirs.

So, that’s my two cents on reality TV.

Hey, if you have the number of that network executive at NBC can you send it to me?

I have an idea about a guy who wants to be a writer someday……he can’t sing. He can’t sell real estate. He doesn’t have a big brother. He doesn’t hang out with a bunch of rich housewives. He won’t get arrested or show up on a “most wanted” list. He doesn’t have 8 kids. Sorry, no hot air balloons. No kids hiding in a box while the world watches the balloon crash to the ground. He lives a fairly normal life. He has a fun job and it allows him to meet cool people from time to time. He has some issues of his own but you’ll have to tune in to see them. Stay tuned for another new reality program coming soon.

As the Josh Joplin song says  – its funny how life turns out, the odds of faith in the face of doubt, camera one closes in, the soundtrack starts, the scene begins….…..you’re playing you now. you’re playing you now. Take a bow. Take a bow.

There might just be something to this reality TV after all……..but hurry up. The 15 minute clock of fame is ticking.

Thanks for listening. Stay tuned.

G

Check out Josh Joplin on iTunes. The song Camera One comes from his album Useful Music. Enjoy.

Peace, Love, & Understanding

By Geoff Cottrill (with some borrowed lyrics from Elvis Costello)

November 5, 2009

Tonight I am flying back across the country. I use this time to catch up. I catch up on my reading. I catch up on my e-mails. I catch up on my music. Tonight, as I was writing another piece my iPod played. One of my favorite songs from long ago, a song I probably hadn’t listened to for several years, came on. The song Peace, Love, & Understanding by Elvis Costello. For some reason tonight the song seemed poignant. I am not sure what it is that I am thinking about as I listen to it but for some reason the song hit me in a way it hadn’t all those years ago when I liked it for its anger. What I heard tonight for the first time was its optimism. So, thank God for time to catch up.

The song was written years ago but somehow feels as if it was written yesterday afternoon.

Here are Mr. Costello’s lyrics (just in case you’ve forgotten)….. 3:31 of greatness

As I walk through

This wicked world

Searching for light in the darkness of insanity

I ask myself

Is all hope lost

Is there only pain and hatred, and misery

And each time I feel like this inside

There’s one thing I want to know

What’s so funny ‘bout peace, love, & understanding

What’s so funny ‘bout peace, love, & understanding

And as I walk on

Through troubled times

My spirit gets so down hearted sometimes

So where are the strong

And who are the trusted

And where is the harmony, sweet harmony

‘cuz each time I feel it slipping away

Just makes me want to cry

What’s so funny ‘bout peace, love, & understanding

What’s so funny ‘bout peace, love, & understanding

So where are the strong

And who are the trusted

And where is the harmony, sweet harmony

‘cuz each time I feel it slipping away

Just makes me want to cry

What’s so funny ‘bout peace, love, & understanding

What’s so funny ‘bout peace, love, & understanding

What’s so funny ‘bout peace, love, & understanding

(end)

 

Three simple words – peace, love, & understanding

Where is the harmony, sweet harmony?

So, ask yourself – is all hope lost?

I hope not.

 

Thanks for listening…

 

G

Thanks Mom & Dad

by Geoff Cottrill

July 2009

Life is funny. There isn’t a day that passes when I don’t find something to make me smile, to make me laugh. Yet, as funny as life is it’s also become complicated. At what point did life change from the carefree attitude of our youth to the responsibility heavy, chaotic life I am now living?

I am going to be 46 years old in a few months. No, this isn’t a piece about some approaching mid-life crisis. I’ve long ago accepted the fact that the clock is ticking. There isn’t much any of us can do about that and a fancy new sports car isn’t going to change it.

Instead of chasing things I don’t have anymore, like my youth, I am going to take a minute and think about all that I have. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I have a wonderful life. A happy family, love, a beautiful home in the country, a fun job, and hope that my two daughters will find peace, joy, and true love.

This one is about stopping for a minute and smelling the roses. I am going to leave the sharp tongue and sarcasm out of this entry. This piece is about giving thanks to two people I owe my very existence to. Yes, this one’s for you Mom & Dad. I have a feeling this piece is going to take a little time to write as I am finding the tears hard to hold back as I write this. You see, I owe these two people thanks because of all they have done for me; for my brother; for my sister; and for the rest of our extended family.

My Mom & Dad had me when they were 18-19 years old. They were living in Cleveland, Ohio. They were high school sweethearts who found themselves in love and in a situation that called for them to get married. Yes, I was born approx 7 months after they were married. Although we’ve never actually talked about this I am pretty sure that I am right. I was educated in the great state of Florida so sometimes my math skills are a little shaky, but I think I have this one figured out.

Yes, two kids in love that made a choice. As a result of the choice they made I am here today, typing away, sharing my thoughts with you.

The older I get. The more time I spend watching my own two beautiful daughters grow up in front of my eyes. The more I realize how difficult it is to raise a happy, loving family, the deeper I understand the amount of sacrifice it takes.

My folks provided me with everything in the world. They taught me right from wrong. They showed me the meaning of love. They showed me that using common sense and treating people the way I myself want to be treated was the key to success. They came to my soccer, baseball, and football games. They provided so much and at the same time sacrificed so much. They did this for us. Two kids in love, dedicated their lives to raising three kids, putting us all through college – something they didn’t get to do themselves.

I could go on and on about all they gave but I won’t.

Today, as I contemplate the middle of the crazy life I have lived. I stop for a minute and think about all that I have to be grateful for. There are many things. I don’t know about you or the state of your life today. I hope that whatever life you are living that it is filled with the simple and powerful joys of love. Take a minute to think about, and then take the time to reach out and say thanks to, the people you are most grateful to.

For me, today I’d like to say thanks to those two kids who fell in love 46 years ago and have never stopped giving since.

Thanks Mom & Dad.

I love you.

Lollapalooza – August 2009

Close your eyes. Imagine standing outside, a driving rain hitting your face as you look up to the sky. You look down and see your favorite pair of Chucks covered in mud. The used to be blue, didn’t they?  As the rain continues you bob & weave as you walk from one end of Grant Park to the other. Welcome to Lollapalooza 2009.

This is my second visit to this Chicago-based festival. I’m afraid to say that I’m old enough to have attended this festival when it was a traveling tour. As festivals go, this is one of the top three in the US. The organizers do a nice job of utilizing the massive space of the lakefront park. The two main stages are located almost a mile away from one another – although when walking in the rain and trying to avoid the massive puddles and drunk hipsters it seems more like 5 miles.

OK, so I’ve had better festival experiences than I had this weekend. Something was missing for me here. I haven’t been able to put my finger on it. Somehow the festival lacked a certain energy. Don’t get me wrong, there was certainly a lot of energy and excitement in the crowd but I couldn’t help but to get the feeling that the special nature of the music festival is losing a bit of steam. I saw some great bands and I heard some good (and not so good) music this past weekend. When I wasn’t trying to navigate my way to one of the stages through the VIP tents, the merchandise tents, the beer lines, lines for free water, and the general traffic jams that are customary with these kinds of events. Maybe I am just getting old. It’s a definite possibility.

Chicago doesn’t have the same requirements on their cabbies as cities like NYC have. In NYC or London you can name almost any street and they will get you there right away. In Chicago, when you ask to be dropped off at Grant Park, our cabbie told us he didn’t know where it was. Grant Park. Um, it sits on that big lake just over there. You do know there is a lake here, right? He looked at us with a blank look and said he didn’t know where it was. So, after a short ride and a stop at a red light, we jumped out and started walking. I travel quite a bit. I know that a lot of places count on the dollars from business travelers, conventions, festivals, and other tourist related activities. If I were you, I’d teach your cabbies how to get around your beautiful town. I’ve always thought that Chicago was a nice place. It is beautiful, especially in the summer. I do think however that it has a bit of a chip on its shoulder that it isn’t as cool as NYC, LA, San Fran, Boston, or a few other places. OK, back to the music……

The musical highlight of the weekend for me was the Saturday afternoon set delivered by Gomez. They started off a little slow with a few sound problems. Once they got a song or two into their hour long set and their sound team adjusted a few things it all fell into place. These guys are still considered by some to be one of the best mid-sized bands out there. I saw them years ago at Music Midtown in Atlanta. I believe it was their first visit to the states. They’ve come along way since then. These guys are on the verge of the next level, I think. They’ve put in the time on the road, built a fan base, and their music is interesting.

Other highlights for me included Fleet Foxes, Santigold, and Arctic Monkeys. These three artists are a great example of some of the outstanding music that is out there right now. Santigold (formerly Santogold) is in a class of her own. She brings a style and energy to the stage that’s unique. Fleet Foxes, one of the bands changing the scene in Seattle, were also solid. The Pacific Northwest music scene is thriving. I also picked up a bit of the Decemberists set. In my mind, they are the crème of the crop coming out of the PNW.

The Arctic Monkeys blew me away. These guys stepped up and delivered a good old fashioned rock show. These guys are young. They have an edge. They’ve channeled their youthful energy, angst, and anger into their music. These guys are for real and have a bright future as long as they keep their eye on the prize. Too many of these bands these days burn out too quickly. They put out a good record, begin to believe the reviews, party their brains out, and then fail to remember what got them there to begin with – the music.

For some reason though, I think these guys are going to be around for a while. They are the real deal.

The best part of the weekend for me was seeing Tool. I know very little about them. I’ve heard their music along the way but have never had the opportunity or desire to see them live. Had they not been playing Lollapalooza this weekend I’m sure I would have never seen them. These guys are a big-time rock band. Their set was powerful and their fans enjoyed every last minute of the show. Their video show was deeply disturbing. I have no idea who did it for them or what the hell they were thinking when they created it. This stuff is simply disturbing. Having said that, it all worked so well together. It was exactly what it was supposed to be. I don’t understand it, but I loved it.

The most disappointing performance of the weekend for me was Depeche Mode. Full disclosure, I never liked these guys to begin with. I am a child of the 70’s, graduated high school in the early 80’s, and was in my final year of college as these guys started to dominate their space in clubs all over the world. I was always more of a jeans and t-shirt guy, hanging out at the local dive bar drinking beer from a can. These guys come from a different place. Their set was boring. It had no energy. The guys in the band seemed old and trying to act young. I was standing in one of the VIP Cabanas during the show, after a full day in the mud and rain. I decided to go with the crowd and forego the Kings of Leon show at the other end of the park. So, I stood there and watched Depeche Mode’s set.  Shoot me dead if I ever have to watch another one of their shows. As far as I am concerned these guys need to go away.

Music can unite us. Music separates us, makes us into individuals at the same time it makes us a part of something bigger than ourselves. Music is subjective. One person’s favorite concert is another’s worst ever. That’s a beautiful thing. Standing in the mud, feeling the rain hit my face, bobbing and weaving to avoid the masses, I was reminded why I love music so much – even when I hate it at the same time. I have my fingers crossed that the music festival scene doesn’t lose the magic. There need to be fewer of them. They need to be special again. Each of them need to maintain their own sense of identity.

A parting thought -  I plead to the festival organizers – keep these things alive and fun. Celebrate the sense of freedom. Fire your jack-ass, power tripping, walkie-talkie wearing manager of the merchandise tent who was an absolute jerk to a group of us when trying to buy a hat. Whether or not he was right or wrong, he didn’t need to be such a jerk. As someone who manages a fairly large marketing budget , and spends a great deal of it to support the music world, I can tell you that dollars coming your way will dry up if your people keep biting some of the hands that feed the process. There’s at least one in every crowd, I realize that. Just ask your people to treat the fans with a little more respect than they treated a few of the sponsors.

Be nice. Remember why we came to begin with. We came to escape. We came to belong. We came to experience. We came to be free. We came to let go. We came for fun. We came to be with our friends. We came to meet new ones. We came for the music. We came because we love it more than anything else. When we come, we bring our hard earned money with us. In case you’ve missed the recent news reports, a lot of us don’t have as much money as we once had. So, our dollars are precious. We spend them on things that will help us forget. We spend them on things that will inspire us. We spend them on things that will transport us, physically, spiritually, and mentally.

We come because we want to hear the music. We come because we want to feel the music. We want you to remember these things. We thank you for creating the space and providing the experience. We ask that you don’t ever forget why we come. Please keep these things in mind as you calculate your wins and losses from the weekend.

If you forget why we come, we’ll stop coming.

Stay tuned.

G

 

www.alphainventions.com

 

WANDERLUST – July 2009

Squaw Valley (Lake Tahoe)

Close your eyes. Imagine a beautiful afternoon, standing on top of a mountain, looking up at a sky so blue you can almost see outer space. Imagine the beautiful yellow wild flowers growing everywhere, the sun shining, and incredible, intelligent music in the air. Now, look up the hill to see the 4 people standing there with hoola hoops around their waist, keeping with the beat of a soulful Gillian Welch song.  Everywhere you look people are happy, not in a drug induced Woodstock sort of way either. These people are just happy to be here, sharing this moment in the sun together. And, the music continues to get better and better as the afternoon marches toward a beautiful sunset over the mountain.

This wasn’t a dream, although I must say that at times it felt like one. This was my day at the Wanderlust Festival. This was the first year of what I hope will become an annual trip for me and for many, many others.

OK, full disclosure here. The festival was started by two friends of mine. Jeff Krasno (and his wife Schyluer – forgive me if I spelled this wrong) and Sean Hoess from Velour Music. Two guys who care a lot about the artists they work with and the music they make. Jeff, Schyluer, & Sean had an idea. The idea was to create an annual festival where the wonders of  yoga and the beauty of music come together into a celebration of life. From my perspective they’ve created a special & unique experience. These three people had an idea, developed their vision, and created something new & interesting. This is an event I hope grows as more and more like-minded people learn about it. This is why I am writing this entry tonight as I fly across the country back home to Carlisle. This idea has great promise and it will take participation from many of us to help it become realized.

I didn’t know what Wanderlust meant either – so I looked it up on Webster’s on-line.

Here’s what it means:

Very strong or irresistible impulse to travel.

Roving, vagrancy, marching and countermarching; nomadism; vagabondism, hoboism; gadding; flit, flitting, migration; emigration, immigration, demigration, intermigration; wanderlust.

So, lets Wanderlust together for a few minutes….

My day started with a stroll through the village of Squaw Valley, the former site of the winter Olympics. As I walked through the crowd at 8.30 in the morning I watched as the vendors set up their booths to sell yoga mats, clothing for yoga, natural foods, Cliff bars, jewelry, crystals, as well as booths to support various causes connected to this world. Inspiring stuff.

I have never done yoga. I have always had a bit of a blind spot for it, knowing it was out there somewhere but I just couldn’t see it. Well, at Wanderlust the yoga life is in full swing. It’s true, it’s a way of life. The event featured the top yoga instructors in the country putting on various classes throughout the weekend.

After taking a stroll through the village and the securing of a Diet Coke (note: this is not the chosen beverage of the yoga community), I boarded the gigantic gondola and headed up the mountain (Cliff bar, apple, and another Diet Coke in hand). When I stepped off I heard the strangest sound. It was a familiar beat. But, it wasn’t a beat I would have ever expected to hear at the top of this magnificent mountain with all of these yoga people surrounding me. It was hip-hop. I turned the corner only to see 50 people laying on the ground, contorting their bodies in ways unimaginable to my 46 year old body. Welcome to hip-hop yoga. One of the dozen of different types of yoga classes offered as part of Wanderlust. It shattered every preconceived notion I have ever had about yoga. People of all shapes and sizes, sprawled on the floor, hip-hop music pumping, as they worked it out. It was crazy.

After about a 10 minute walk through the yellow wild flowers I reached a temporary village poised on top of a plateau. The view was breathtaking (maybe it was the altitude and the several beers I had the night before, I don’t  really know).  The village included a stage, various hemp & yoga vendors, a hoola hoop tent, hats, t-shirts, and (thank the lord) a beer stand. Hopefully you are feeling the vibe of the event by now.

I find a nice spot on the hill and sit down to listen to some music. As I look around I realize that I am surrounded by happy people everywhere. These people seem to have a certain inner peace about them. They’re friendly to one another, respectful to the land and to the music they’re listening to. I’ve been to virtually every major music festival in the country over the past 5 years. As I think about my experiences at Coachella, Bonnaroo, or Lolapalooza I am reminded that there are far fewer happy people attending those festivals. Each of them has their own unique vibe. Coachella has the young hipster B list LA kids posing and working hard to appear they didn’t try too hard when they got dressed. Bonnaroo and its sea of sweaty college kids without shoes or shirts on, searching for a place to cool off. Lollapalooza and its mass of mid-westerners walking around in their flip flops and eating brats. Wanderlust has its low key, laid back, earth loving, friendly crowd on top of a mountain. Which one sounds the best to you?

OK, on to the music. The first band up for me was Rouge Wave. A young band somewhat reminiscent of Death Cab For Cutie. They are part of the Brushfire label, a group of artists that are laid back and environmentally conscience. They put on a nice show that lasted about 45 minutes, culminating with their song Lake Michigan. I love the song and their performance of it. I am glad to not have been disappointed by the boys from Oakland. They are 1-2 good songs away from the next level. I for one am rooting for them. Check them out when you have a minute.

Up next was Gillian Welch. This artist was a mainstay favorite of the core Hear Music folks at Starbucks. I was introduced to her music while working there. She blew me away. She delivers a beautiful southern blues/country mix from her guitar or banjo. She hails from Tennessee and if you haven’t seen her live I’d encourage you to do so when she rolls through your town. Her music is the kind you like to listen to on a late Saturday afternoon in your back yard after you’ve cut the grass, enjoying a glass of tea of lemonade (or a beer). She has such a nice voice. An amazing artist that delivers beautiful music. I closed my eyes and pictured myself back home in the South.

Following Gillian was the highlight of the trip for me. Jenny Lewis and her band hit the stage. I have wanted to see her perform for a few years now. She also fronts a band called Rilo Kiley that you may have heard of. Jenny takes the stage and immediately takes us to a new place. This young woman brings a sense of style, and an effortless sense of cool. I can tell that she deeply feels each note and word in every song. For her (in my opinion) performing live is an opportunity to work through her pain. She has a certain edge and at the same time a hint of vulnerability. This quality draws you to the stage and as much as you want to look away you can’t. She commands the stage and delivers with strength, passion, and a lovely voice. The highlight of the show for me was her acoustic version of the Rilo KIley track “Silver Lining”. I must admit, I had a small tear in my eye as she sang it. Later in the set she nailed a cover of the Traveling Wilbury’s track Handle Me With Care. Stellar. Another highlight for me was the song Acid Tongue. I’d heard it before but I now have a different perspective of it. In fact I am listening to it as I write this. Just before she split she and another band member delivered a beautiful and intense version of the song, “Love Hurts”. They took the song to new levels for me and delivered it with intimacy and intensity. If you haven’t checked her out, take a few minutes to do so. She just may be the best new artist out there right now. She doesn’t fit a niche which is what makes her so compelling. She is my new favorite.

The afternoon rolls on. After the Jenny Lewis set the stage was reset for the headline act of the day. Here comes Common. This guy nailed it. He is a family friendly hip-hop artist that somehow is able to walk the fine line and still include tracks about chicks & sex. Common rocked the house. There we were, standing on a mountain in Lake Tahoe watching Common absolutely deliver the goods. There wasn’t a single “yogi” in the house that wasn’t singing along and dancing. Common delivered a tremendous hip-hop medley that celebrated some of the great west coast artists and tracks. His DJ was phenomenal as well. He kept the crowd on its feet. He played for an hour and the scene was electric. He delivered a message of love and of hope. He inspired the crowd, including this non-yogi. (Yes, I realized this weekend that the bear I grew up loving isn’t the only “yogi” in the world…..hey boo boo).

After Common’s show, we headed to the “fire & ice” dinner. This featured various chefs from the region. The food and the spread were spectacular. The dinner was on a terrace over looking the mountains as the sun set on a wonderful day. As I ate my dinner I felt as if I had gotten my money’s worth and then some. In my mind the day was coming to an end. Boy, was I wrong.

As the evening got into full swing the crowd gathered at the lower stage to see Girl Talk. This guy is amazing and perhaps has the best job in music. He takes the greatest hooks from the greatest songs, lays down a few extra beats, ties them all together and brings it hard. I stood there and watched as they let about a hundred people up on stage to dance as the DJ delivered the goods. Here I am standing there watching all of these ‘yogi’s” dance their heads off. The entire crowd was going nuts. Part of his show includes people holding what appeared to be leaf blowers with rolls of toilet paper attached to the end. They start them up and the TP begins to fly. I haven’t seen this much TP in the air since I hit my brother Alex’s house the first day he moved in to it.  Picture the scene, the DJ rocking the house, yogi’s (and non-yogi’s) dancing, the night sky filled with flying streams of Charmin. It was hysterical and highly entertaining all at once.

The Girl Talk show comes to an end. The happy people and their happiness are at a peak. I am observing, thinking that this place is happier than Disney World and their Main Street Parade. I stand back with my friends Jeff & Sean and watch as the crowd dissipates. I am thinking its time for bed. I am exhausted and am assuming that everyone else is as well. Well, surprise.  The night isn’t over yet. The crowd moves to the main yoga tent for a session of “midnight twister”. Yep, you heard me right. The old Milton & Bradley game we’ve all played a million times. So as I thought my near perfect day was coming to an end and that I’d been exposed to all the festival had to give me – I was surprised yet once again. And, I learned quickly that a non-yogi has no right stepping on the multi-colored bubble Twister floor. Nope. This is a form of Twister that is not for the weak of heart. I stood back and watched as the enormous floor filled with 50 or so people. The game began and the yogi’s contorted themselves into places and positions that are just not natural. As the competition unfolded each competitor who failed a maneuver was squirted with a water bottle and excused from the floor. Yes, they are even nice when asking you to leave the game. The competition pressed on with head stands, standing on one leg with an arm touching a colored bubble 3 feet away. It hurt just to watch but boy was it impressive (and funny). In the end, Schyuler (one of the organizers and founders of the event) wins the prize. Jeff, her husband, whispers to me that she is also 4 months pregnant with their third daughter. They are both pretty happy at this very moment. The moon and the stars are aligned for them. It makes me happy for my friend.

So, the midnight twister event was the culmination of my day of fun in the sun. As I started to walk home Jeff reminded me of the late night VIP party on the mountain. Some DJ I had never heard of was playing and the party was sure to be a blast. I just waved and walked back to my hotel. As I walked back I couldn’t help to smile. I’d just attended a wonderful event, put on by people who took the time and energy to do it right. They may (or may not ) have lost money in this endeavor. It takes time for ideas like this to grow. The seeds have been planted and I am sure that with the love and attention of this team that it is sure to grow into something wonderful, lasting, and very necessary.

So, throw out your preconceived ideas about the yoga lifestyle. These people start their day with yoga, rock & roll, hip-hop, dance, and then end their day with a session of midnight twister. And they do this while making a non-yogi feel at home with his new friends.

I’ll be back next year. I’ll be back with my wife Allie and my two daughters Abby & Claire. This is something they need to see. If you get the chance, its something you should see too.

Thanks Kraz, Sean, & Schyleur.

G

Sometimes I open up my laptop and just start writing. Sometimes the things I write make a lot of sense. Other times they don’t.

This one is just for me. I don’t think too many other people will care too much about what I am saying here and that’s ok. This one is for someone who has given me a great gift.

Peace

Something happened.

Something changed along the way.

Certain things became less important than before.

Something in my mind shifted.

It moved in a different direction.

It ceased remembering things that no longer seemed important.

Suddenly.

Clarity, in the midst of a cloudy & drizzly day in Seattle.

I wasn’t meant for this place.

I had made a mistake. Once I got inside and saw the hypocrisy surrounding me I realized that I wanted to be a better man than the people that many have looked up to.

I decided to let go of what once was a dream because it wasn’t a dream at all.

It was not what it seemed to be.

Liars surrounded me.

I learned.

Sometimes the things you fool yourself to believe in let you down.

Or, they can point you in a new direction.

Clarity.

I was running.

I had been running for a long time.

Restless and unable to find peace, I was.

Suddenly I saw things in a different light.

Allie was there, as she always has been, to show me something new.

She helped me see something I had not seen in a long, long time.

I found it. I had looked for years, searching for it.

Then, in an instant I realized it was right there.

I realized that I hadn’t been looking for it at all.

I had been running away from it.

Peace. A sense of being centered & content.

A realization that it surrounds me every day.

It comes in the form of a slight touch on my hand.

It comes in the smiles of my daughters.

It comes in the falling of leaves, the cool air, the beauty of a quiet walk in the woods with my old dog.

I carry it with me wherever I go.

The voice inside my head reminds me now.

I have found peace for the first time in my life.

I am not going to let it go.

I am lucky, as I have said many times.

I have much.

I lack little.

I have been to wonderful places, met a lot of amazing people and seen a lot of  incredible things.

Still there are many unanswered questions.  This I know for sure.

Some I will get answered, many I won’t.

I have realized that it isn’t the destination that’s important.

It’s not about checking the box, competing with your neighbor or friend.

Yeah, and this is a cliché I know, but I now understand that it is the journey that makes the person, that molds them into something.

I recently said that I had hope, and I do.

I have something else every bit as powerful and beautiful.

I have peace and I am going to fight to hang on to it.

I have peace.

Thanks to you, Allie.

G

Geoff is ……….

(The status of Facebook)

OK, I admit it. I am addicted to Facebook, just like most of you are. In fact, there’s a good chance you launched this blog entry from my Facebook page. If so, please forgive me for what I am about to do.

On Facebook, I have many “friends”. I have real friends I work with; real friends I know from college; real friends I know from high school; and real friends from the life I’ve lived. I am lucky to have so many real friends.

Like most I also have many acquaintances on Facebook. These people I’ve met via Facebook. Some have been quite interesting to get to know. Most people I’ve linked with have been for networking reasons. My business requires that I keep in touch with a lot of people in the worlds of music, entertainment, and pop culture. This is the best thing about Facebook in my opinion. Its connected me to some very interesting people.

I have a third group of “friends” on Facebook that I do not really know. Some have friended me, some I have friended. These people are not really my friends. I don’t know them. They do not know me. I guess that’s why they don’t call it Friendbook. The name Facebook now makes sense to me.

So, I am not here to talk trash about my Facebook friends (but I am going to). However I need to vent about one of the most annoying pieces of the Facebook experience. It’s your status that I want to talk about. Yes, I am talking to all of you serial status changers.

Like a lot of people, I log into Facebook in the morning and then keep it open while I am working, checking in on it from time to time. Each time I check my home page I am greeted with a massive list of status updates. You know what I mean. Status updates like this:

Chris is……about to mow the lawn.

(these are the kind of updates that frequently show up. I ask – do we really care?)

Chris is…….just finishing cutting the grass

(wow, that was fast)

Chris is…….enjoying a cold beverage after cutting the grass

(a well earned beverage on a hot summer day…..but you are wasting my time my “friend”)

Suzanne is……thinking about life’s mysteries

(wow, that’s deep Suzanne. Are you asking us for help or are you just projecting on us again?)

Louise is …… recovering from a blind date gone wrong. What a LOSER!

(this is the 3^rd such entry this week from my old college friend. This is just sad)

Cat is ……. Getting ready to see Coldplay!!! YAY, YAY, YAY!

( I de-friended Cat immediately when learning of her plans).

Susan is …….. sleepy

(said another way, Susan is deeply depressed)

John is …….. the 2,372,061 person to join the mayonnaise lovers march on Washington

(OK, I made this one up – but you know what I am talking about here…….)

Brandon is ….. wondering what’s at the end of the yellow brink road, thinking maybe I should have taken the blue brink road instead.

(take the red pill buddy. Stay away from the blue and yellow ones)

Emily is ….attending the Fashion Week Fiesta party at Club Thump Thump. Ooo-wee!

(yeah, she is a bit of a party girl – her update tomorrow will indicate her head hurts)

These are all real status updates that have come across my screen the past few weeks. I have cut and pasted them. You can’t make this stuff up (OK, I admit it, I made up a few of them). The names have been changed to protect the innocent (and for fear that you might just de-friend me). I’m a numbers guy so every one of you are important and count in my book.

What is it about that causes people to think that others care what they are doing at that exact moment? Are people that lonely? Do we do it because we somehow want others to know we’re alive? Are we reaching out when we change our status every 5 minutes? Are we crying out for the lack of intimacy in our lives. Do we secretly hope that we are going to receive a flood of e-mails and phone calls when we tell our “friends” that we’ve just picked up the dry cleaning?

I am not sure what this phenomenon says about our society but I think it’s a bit strange and sad. Is it narcissistic? Is it loneliness? What makes us think that people really care? Are we trying to show that we’re witty? That we’re smart? That we’re culturally aware? What does it say? To me, it says all of that and more. When the historians and sociologists look back on these times they will talk about this. They will have studied this; done the qualitative and quantitative analysis, tested their hypothesis, and proven their point. They will prove that we’re preoccupied with the wrong things in life.

It’s a sad state we’re in. We’re living in a time that is more technologically advanced than any time before us. The technology was intended to make our life easier, to free us up from the chains of work and burdens of everyday life. It was intended to give us great freedom. The technology gave promise that we would be more connected to one another. It had the promise of freeing up time so that we could be with our families, our loved ones. It said that you can be standing on top of Tiger Mountain in Seattle and still be in touch with the office back in Miami.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not against the technology and all the promise it brings. Technology does deliver on some of its promises and I couldn’t live without my blackberry, my ipod, my iphone, my laptop with the dvd player inside, the GPS system in my car. I think we’ve gone a little too far though. The technology we live with every day, the technology that was supposed to connect us, has actually isolated us. It has separated us. Yes, we can exchange an e-mail or a text on the fly telling your loved one your loved one you are thinking about them or running late. But, in the end this technology has isolated us. What used to be a continent, a country, a big city, a small town that brought us together to interact has actually created millions of tiny islands inhabited by only one person. At the same time its done all of this, it has also created a sense of entrapment. No longer can you escape a call from the office in Miami. Why would you want to talk to the office while hiking up Tiger Mountain? Where is the freedom in that? No, all of this technology and these fancy devices have actually diminished our freedom. We used to be able to walk away from the office, from the phone calls, and clear our heads. We used to dream bigger dreams when we had fewer people demanding you return their text in the next 10 minutes. The loss of this personal freedom is coming with a cost. We are losing the intimacy of true friendship. The world is a fast paced place. If we don’t find ways to unplug and escape every once in a while we will lose our edge, our individuality, our creativity. If we lose these things, what are we left with?

We stand next to one another in the subway but we all look down, texting a mile a minute, trying to stay connected to another human being somewhere other than where you are at this moment. All this looking down is causing people to miss opportunities to truly connect with another person. Updating your status on Facebook every fifteen minutes it proof of this. It says to me, “I’m afraid to talk to the person sitting next to me for fear they might think that I am not interesting…but hey, I am so connected……people care so much about me that I feel compelled to share with them that my laundry has been picked up”.

I ask the question, do you think your friends really care? Yes, some do. I will admit that. But, if we are honest with one another, most don’t. We read the status updates and immediately think, “hey, this person doesn’t have enough to do” or, “please stop wasting my time with your attempt to be witty or cute”.

Wait, I have to take a break and check in on my Facebook page.

More status entries:

Paul is ……..daydreaming

(get back to work, jobs are moving to China and India because we’re not paying attention to the work in front of us…wake up my friend)

Laurie Ann is ….proud of herself for detailing her car to save some $$!

(this is a huge accomplishment for Laurie Ann as she is a trust fund baby. In the past she has traded in her car when it gets too dirty)

Howard is ….. wondering if our new breakfast value meal will save them.

(no comment)

Matthew is …… feeling free and easy

(and just released from rehab)

Jeff is ……… on his way to lunch with Pete and Suzie

(don’t leave me hanging! Where are you going? Are you going to Burger King for your free Whopper for de-friending 5 people? See you there in just a little while…as soon as I cut a few more friends)

Andrea is ……. excited its Wednesday – HUMP DAY!

(my least favorite reference to a day of the week – borderline de-friend candidate)

Steven is …….. just clearing security at Logan and wondering how much longer I am going to have to take off my shoes. LOL!

(nice visual, steven doesn’t shower that often and his Chuck Taylors smell bad– we’ve known each other too long for me to drop him)

Ken is ……still wondering what happened

(you get what you deserve buddy – its called karma)

Christine is ….looking forward to her day at work! Not! LOL!

(another trust fund baby who has never worked a day in her life. I do not like the whole LOL! phenomenon – possibly a future blog entry on the acronyms of the web )

Jimmy is ……. wrecking the music industry

(wrecking? Try the word wrecked….its too late to save it)

Lisa is ….. tired

(always the pessimist)

Gary is …..wishing Elvis was still around

( I do not like Elvis. Although it doesn’t approach the level of disdain I have for Coldplay, I still felt compelled to drop Gary from my friend list – hey, I was hungry and wanted to get a free Whopper).

Shawn is ……working on his new album. Due out in stores on the 17^th!

(did he say stores? they still sell music in stores?)

Trip is ………. calculating his losses from the market

(it was nice while it lasted, wasn’t it Mr. Hamptons?)

Lizzie is ……..happy

(it’s true, she really is happy but please don’t make those annoying little text faces anymore)

Michael is ….. just got laid off. I had no idea a career in catering could disappear so fast.

(I feel for ya but I have no idea how to respond to this one – maybe a little bit too much information).

Laura is …. Designing a cover for a new CD

(a CD? For sale in a store? Really?)

Sharon is …….going out tonight with the gang from work

(many careers have been ended from “going out with the gang from work” – its going to be a long night. Beware: career limiting moves ahead)

Tommy is …….cooking lasagna for 6. Looking good!!!!

(dude, we went to college together. I know all about your past. I am NOT eating that stuff)

Shannon is …… still sore from the six mile run with Suze and Phil on Saturday

(Shannon talks a lot. I would never go running with her)

Don is …..dreaming of a white Christmas

(he is always dreaming. That’s what I like most about him)

Faith is …..wondering how we connected to each other before the Facebook status application was created

(I am thinking exactly the same thing and also considering adding her to the de-friend list, its getting close to lunch and I need that free Whopper).

Sean is ………..happy to be going home but will miss my friends this week. L

Drinks next Tuesday anyone?

(dude, you are cheesy. You used the frown face in your update. Give it up – I just dropped another one on my way to Whopper world)

Stanley is …. Happy to be out of there.

(yep, so am I my friend. So am I)

Bobby is ….. wondering if he’s on the right path

(you are a smart guy. You will figure it out…..but do you need to share this with everyone?)

Dave is ……. Dealing with his demons

(future rehab alumni, just like Ms Lohan and Ms Winehouse)

Suze is ….still shocked by what Shannon said during their run on Saturday

( I hate people who talk while I am running – Shannon has just made my de-friend list)

Craig is ……..wishing I was still on vacation in Alabama

(dude, who vacations in Alabama?)

Jason is …. Listening to the kids giggle

(yeah, we all have kids too. They all giggle from time to time. Its cute. But, I don’t really care about your kids because I have no idea how we became facebook friends to begin with…bye bye Jason – hello double whopper with cheese!)

Charlie is ……digging out

(he is the most unorganized person on the planet. He will be digging out forever)

Dave is ….wondering where we lost our soul, thinking another trip to Bainbridge is in order. Kayaking anyone?

(Oh, don’t get me started about where it went wrong….but you have to accept responsibility for your lack of action)

Phil is…..going to start running with a new group of friends

(I don’t blame you..that Shannon talks too much when she runs)

Alex is ….just wrote the last check to the ex-wife!

(the first one or the second one?)

Chris is ….remembering I forgot to put on deodorant this morning. Wait, did I brush my teeth? LOL!

(dude, that’s just gross. You would have a nice time in China; you would fit right in)

Howard is …… optimistic that our new instant coffee will save our souls.

(um, no comment)

I long for the day when I open up Facebook and I see 100 status updates that say…….

(insert name)……..are going to stop updating our status and start spending some quality time together free from this technology that was supposed to free us.

Geoff is………finishing a blog entry.

Geoff is ………on his way to Burger King for his free Whopper! LOL! J

Geoff is……….going to sign off now. I have to meet a few of my old friends for a Whopper. I hope I don’t see any of the people I dropped to get the free burger! LOL!

Geoff is ………hey wait a minute…..Geoff is updating his status. I give up.

PS – I know that many of you are going to de-friend me after reading this.

Its been nice knowing you. Best of luck with your future status reports.